Dr. Paulette Sherman

7 Ways to Make A Good or Not So Good First Impression

Grandma was right when she said that you should be yourself on dates and she assured you that the right man would love you!  Despite that, there are certain things to avoid and others that will help you make a good first impression:

                     7 Things Not to Do:

  1. Don’t Flirt With Someone Else, like the Waiter
  2. Don’t Maul Your Date in Public or Say Sexually Inappropriate Things Early On
  3. Don’t be really late without calling, with a good reason
  4. Don’t talk about your exes and past relationship troubles the whole time
  5. Don’t discuss all the things that are going wrong in your life
  6. Don’t only discuss yourself
  7. Don’t put down the opposite sex or say derogatory things about love, dating or relationships

                     7 Ways to Make a Good Impression:

1-Be Polite– When you’re dating it’s important to be on time.  You want to be gracious and to pay attention to your date instead of being on your cell phone or looking around at everyone else.  Be a class act.  Make the person before you feel important, even if it’s not a match.

2-Be Confident-Before your date, think about what makes you a great catch.  Know your worth so that you radiate confidence.  There’s nothing more attractive than genuinely liking yourself and your life.

3-Be Appreciative-People want to know that you acknowledge their effort.  Thank them for dinner or drinks and for their time.  Compliment them on their consideration in picking the place, on their sense of humor or whatever stands out as positive about them.  They will remember how you leave them feeling.

4-Know How to Listen-Many dates go awry when one person talks about themselves the whole time.  Ideally, a date’s an equal exchange.  So, remember to ask questions, to be interested in getting to know the other person and to really listen.  People love to feel heard and known, especially if acceptance or admiration follows.  Make your date feel safe to share and validate them when they do.

5-Be Authentic-It’s also important to be willing to share who you really are too.  Don’t pretend to be someone you aren’t.  Being your self is the litmus test of finding a good match.  So, answer the question that’s asked truthfully and take a risk.

6-Wear something that makes you feel Good-Don’t dress to impress the other person, dress so that you feel your best.  Be comfortable but wear something that expresses your personality and makes you feel beautiful so that you shine.

7-Be Friendly– People love to be showered with warmth, so smile, laugh at his jokes and put your hand on his arm, if you feel comfortable.  Body language is a large part of communication.  You want to show that you’re enjoying yourself.  This energy is contagious.  Also, say what a wonderful time you had (if you did).  This will give him the green light to ask you out again.

Hopefully, your date will take the time to get to know you well beyond the first impression.  I know many awkward first dates that end in marriage down the road but we’d like to put our best foot forward from the start so hopefully, these tips will help put your date at ease, allowing you to be true to yourself too.

Happy Dating!

My Best in Love, Paulette